I t has been close to 2 months since I have written anything that is not related to business school. I wish I could say this is because I have been backpacking through remote parts of the world with no internet access, but I can’t. The truth is I have mostly been home in Southern California – being buried underneath piles and piles of never-ending stuff. As I sat and thought about what to write, I kept arriving at the same conclusion – that nothing exciting has happened that anyone would be interested in. That’s when it hit me – I’m living life. The same way other people are day in, and day out.
I thought to myself that nobody would want to hear that I have been living at the fertility clinic since June. How every two weeks, my husband and I make the 50-mile journey one way for me to get poked and prodded like a science experiment. That every night for the past 3 months, he has the honor of giving me painful injections that almost always end up with me in tears and him not knowing how to fix it.
I thought to myself that nobody wants to hear about our upcoming move to Norway. How each day, there’s another phone call to be made and another office on Camp Pendleton to visit to make sure that someone did what they said they would do (spoiler alert: they rarely do). The calendar doesn’t seem to have enough days to accommodate work schedules, school schedules, and visits to see family.
I thought to myself that nobody wants to hear that these past few months have been a revolving door of people leaving our lives. This is the military life cycle – people come in, stay awhile, and then move onto whatever comes next. You hope to cross paths again, but you never know for sure. With everything that has happened these past 2 years, our circle of friends at this duty station are particularly special. Some of them are people we were in Bahrain with. Others were new. Regardless of the history, they have been a pillar for us surviving the ups and downs of life.
Despite my thoughts, though, this is life. It is messy and boring, and then it’s exciting again. People come, and then they go. I try to remember that we weren’t meant to live a life completely void of heartache. That’s not the point. The point is to have to put in a bit of elbow grease and seek faith to get you through to the other side. Once you’re there, that’s where the real magic happens.
So, if anybody needs me, I will be here – writing. Not about the glamour of life but the reality. The truth is my life is a complicated mix of every emotion right now – and it’s perfect.